Relationship Personality Profile Results
for Chad Ferencak/03-1145898266-A
8/20/2003

You're loved, and for good reasons
You're a very down-to-earth man with a unique passion for life that most other men lack. You're a man who celebrates life. You live in the here and now and try to go with the flow. However, you're also a man of great integrity who'll stand up and fight for causes he believes in. You have a vision for how to live the "good life," so you refuse to settle for a boring job or doing something just because it's expected of you. Life should be "balanced" with plenty of time for fun, spontaneity, and romance! You have lots of friends and really appreciate the people in your life. You put the ones you love ahead of everything else. Unlike most men, you're not afraid to talk about (and feel!) emotions. In fact, you're ready and able to have a powerful "spark" with someone; you're ready to share the true romantic inside of you that's dying to get out.

What's dating all about to you?
Falling in love is a spiritual experience for you. Falling in love comes naturally to you. It doesn't have to make sense. You're ready to "go with the flow" and see where it leads. A truly loving relationship helps bring meaning to your life. You always strive to make your lover feel comfortable and content. You're good at anticipating what other people need and giving it to them. Given your extremely high levels of commitment, empathy and devotion, any woman would truly be "lucky to have you" in her life. Although your compassion for women is a very attractive quality, sometimes your focus on her can get in the way of getting what you want or need. It's crucial to find a way to "go with the flow" in dating as you already do in other parts of your life, but to also be sure you don't let a woman take advantage of your good nature.

How unique is your personality type?
Very! Your personality profile is not very similar to other men. When looking at over 100,000 other male test subjects, 1% (or 1 in 100 men) or less have very similar beliefs, values, and habits.

Quirks women notice
Like all people, you have your strengths as well as your "quirks". Ultimately, you want to find someone who will love and accept you "warts and all." Though you have lots of friends, it's important to have at least one person who understands, or even enjoys, your exhibited quirks.

Your Exhibited Quirks:

• You won't be too bothered by the fact that your partner always has multiple projects and hobbies going on with few ever finished.
• You have such a positive attitude that at times your upbeat mood may irritate those who think you're "too happy" or aren't taking problems seriously.
• Because you're a big-hearted man, at times you can be swayed too much by emotions and a desire to keep your friends and family happy.
• You have a pretty even-tempered personality and may not have any especially annoying or quirky habits. Of course, seeming to be "perfect" could be seen as a flaw by some, in which case you may just want to pretend to have a few bad habits!

Do women like your type?
Notice that 10% of women surveyed are generally attracted to your personality type. 85% say they are VERY attracted. 1% are turned off by your traits. The remaining 4% are indifferent to your personality.

Who You're Looking For
She'll be an enigma!
You're looking for a very balanced woman. She'll have clear goals in life and dreams she hopes to pursue while still being practical about the realities of life. She's very compassionate and understanding. She'll manage to balance an objective and rational side with her compassionate and caring side. She feels and believes in people and causes very deeply. Her passion for life can be exciting and contagious. She's a fun and free spirit, but will still do what she promises and will be on time for every date. You'll both enjoy going out with friends but also love spending quiet times together. Sound too good to be true? Women who are truly balanced like this are rare, but they do exist and would be an excellent fit for you.

Overall, it's important for you to be with someone who is almost always cheerful and has an optimistic outlook on life. The ideal person you're seeking shares a number of positive qualities with you, including:

• You both share a cheerful and optimistic outlook on life.
• She's very in tune with and considerate of others' feelings.

Number of women your type
Women with the exact type of personality you prefer are rare gems. Looking at over 100,000 women who have taken this test, only 2% (or 1 in 50 women) have the exact combination of similarities and contrasts in personality you find extremely appealing.

However, there's a larger group, 16% (or 1 in 6 women), who have most, but not all, of the qualities and habits you like.

More than One-third of the women have at least some of the traits you find attractive.

But you'd have a negative reaction to 5% (or 1 in 20 women), who have some or many of the characteristics you clearly dislike.

Finding someone like you
You want to share your life with someone who has the same values, goals, and style you have. Research has shown that couples who have more in common tend to stay together longer. The qualities you find attractive (and unattractive) in women suggest you would certainly be happier with a woman who's more like you.

• No very strong opposites were detected, which suggests that you are most attracted to women who are very similar to you. This is good news since similar couples tend to stay together longer.

• You can appreciate that her big heart lets her be swayed too much by emotions and a desire to keep her friends and family happy.
• There will be days when you think she's simply "too happy" all the time. Doesn't anything get her down? Is she human?
• You can get frustrated by her lack of input on decisions. Typically you're left alone to make decisions about what to do, where to go, etc. But most of the time the balance between you helps things go very smoothly.
• You described a pretty balanced person as most attractive to you, so no strong quirks were noted. Watch out for quirks during dating, since they may indicate a strong quality that is hidden at first.

Downside of your "ideal"
In addition to her quirks, your "ideal" personality type may have other qualities that are more frustrating or challenging to deal with. Under stress, her quirks can become serious "flaws." But remember, these quirks are the "flip side of the coin," or the extreme end of qualities you otherwise find appealing. So, be prepared if:

• Because you're most attracted to women with balanced personalities, no troubling differences were noted. Nevertheless, remember that too much similarity can lead to conflict as well, especially when problems call for very different perspectives or actions.

• Women who rarely open up completely and share their true feelings about the issues and events in your lives.

Trade-offs you'll face

Sex

Lots of sexual passion
As you probably know, you have a higher sex drive than most! Great sex is important to you, but it's only one of many ways you connect emotionally. You give and receive pleasure easily, whether it's sexual or simply an affectionate touch. The connection you feel from making love energizes and comforts you in a way most people wouldn't understand. You're looking for someone just like you, who values the quality of sex over quantity. You'll be spending most of your time together in warm, loving embraces anyway; so even if the frequency of actual intercourse isn't as often as you would like, it won't be an issue. An astonishing sex life awaits your future partner. By bringing your natural creativity to the bedroom, your sex life will never be boring. You know what it's like to emotionally connect with someone and truly make love (vs. just having sex). You deserve a woman just as loving and sensual as you. You should hold out for a woman who shares your passions for life and love.

Among men your age, your particular combination of sexual drive and interests is similar to about 1 in 100 men (1%).

Is she sexually compatible?
To you, spontaneity, playfulness and fun is what sex is all about. You're skilled at exciting and surprising your partner with new techniques and fantasies. You deeply value the quality of sex, and are never upset if the quantity or frequency of sex is lower than you'd actually like.

What's ahead for you sexually?
Almost everyone eventually experiences some kind of sexual miscommunication or lack of interest with a partner. The good news for you? You're naturally suited to handle it. You bring spontaneity, fun and affection to everything you do. Talking about sex in the same positive and up-beat way will help you find the solution (or compromise) that works for both of you. If your sex life ever needs a jump-start, you're creative and imaginative enough to heat things up in bed. If the problem is more serious, you're naturally insightful and will probably have a clear picture of what's going on. Your future partner will be very lucky to be with someone like you who can bring enormous warmth and compassion to even the most frustrating relationships.

Your Interpersonal Communication Styles

OVERVIEW:

• You like being with people. This may be exhibited by the desire to gain popularity, achieve social recognition or influence people around you. The "bottom-line" is a strong people orientation.
• You have a strong feeling of optimism, considered favorably by most people around you. Your perception is that the bottle is half-full rather than half-empty.
• You have a strong sense of humor. You usually know when to lighten a difficult situation, amuse and entertain people.

Your Communication Specifics:

Each person has a unique way of communicating. We use a combination of body language, facial expression, verbal tone and word choice to share ourselves with others. The following statements offer a look at the natural behavior you bring to an interpersonal relationship.

• You show sympathy to the feelings and needs of others. Your natural empathy style may draw others to you.
• You have a natural, outgoing style that some have labeled as the "natural salesperson." You are generally likable, talkative and socially assertive. Your primary intent is convincing or persuading people.
• One of your great strengths is your ability to communicate and talk readily. Since all strengths may be overused at times, you may sometimes talk too much.
• You are a natural communicator. You love to talk, offer jokes and make sure that everyone is having a good time. This trait is especially evident at functions and outings.
• You can generate enthusiasm in yourself and in other people. Your enthusiasm, often contagious, involves many people in a social activity who might not ordinarily become involved

Communication Traits to look for in a Partner:

Many different factors determine the communication styles with which you are most comfortable. Some individuals thrive on the challenge of pointed criticism, while others are at their best in a nurturing environment where criticism is offered as a suggestion for improvement. Each of us has a unique set of requirements and preferences. Below is a list of communication styles that will mesh well with your own. Having a partner who understands and practices these traits is important to your long-term happiness.

• Take time to be certain that you reach an agreement.
• Plan interactions which support dreams and goals.
• Be sincere and use a tone of voice that shows sincerity.
• Talk about expectations.
• Provide solid, tangible, practical ideas and evidence.
• Keep the conversation at the discussion level, rather than confrontation.
• Leave plenty of time for socializing and relating.
• Allow time to ask questions.
• Offer opinions and ideas that are stimulating.
• Be prepared to listen to many stories.
• Take time during explanations.
  

Your Character Traits

Following are some of the specific strengths and/or personal characteristics that you bring to a relationship. These may form the foundations of many of your friendships and dealings with other people. Some will seem obvious, but you may be surprised by others. Take a moment to reflect on each and consider what role it may have played in your past successes, and even failures.

• You tend to bring feelings of security and stability to a relationship.
• You tend to enjoy life and share that enjoyment with others.
• You are very skilled at trying to find"win-win" solutions when conflicts arise.
• You are optimistic and tend to make others feel good about themselves.
• You are very respectful of the needs of other people.
• You are generally quite good at cooling down tense situations in a relationship.
• You are people-oriented.
• You are usually enthusiastic about partner-oriented activities
  

In general, human beings are defined by their needs and individuals by their wants. Your emotional wants are especially important when establishing with whom you are compatible. By answering this survey, you established a pattern of basic, subconscious wants. This section of the report was produced by analyzing those patterns. Our wants change as we mature and obtain our life goals. You may find it valuable to revisit this section periodically to see how your wants have changed.

You seem to want:

• Support for your ideas and dreams.
• A friendly, favorable environment.
• Partners who practice listening and participation.
• Freedom from any limitations of your creativity.
  

INFPs present a calm, pleasant face to the world. They appear to be tranquil and peaceful to others, with simple desires. In fact, the INFP internally feels his or her life intensely. In the relationship arena, this causes them to have a very deep capacity for love and caring which is not frequently found with such intensity in the other types. The INFP does not devote their intense feelings towards just anyone, and are relatively reserved about expressing their inner-most feelings. They reserve their deepest love and caring for a select few who are closest to them. INFPs are generally laid-back, supportive and nurturing in their close relationships. With Introverted Feeling dominating their personality, they're very sensitive and in-tune with people's feelings, and feel genuine concern and caring for others. Slow to trust others and cautious in the beginning of a relationship, an INFP will be fiercely loyal once they are committed. With their strong inner core of values, they are intense individuals who value depth and authenticity in their relationships, and hold those who understand and accept the INFP's perspectives in especially high regard. INFPs are usually adaptable and congenial, unless one of their ruling principles has been violated, in which case they stop adapting and become staunch defenders of their values. They will be uncharacteristically harsh and rigid in such a situation.

Most INFPs will exhibit the following strengths with regards to relationship issues:

• Warmly concerned and caring towards others
• Sensitive and perceptive about what others are feeling
• Loyal and committed - they want lifelong relationships
• Deep capacity for love and caring
• Driven to meet other's needs
• Strive for "win-win" situations
• Nurturing, supportive and encouraging
• Likely to recognize and appreciate other's need for space
• Able to express themselves well
• Flexible and diverse

Most INFPs will exhibit the following weaknesses with regards to relationship issues:

• May tend to be shy and reserved
• Don't like to have their "space" invaded
• Extreme dislike of conflict
• Extreme dislike of criticism
• Strong need to receive praise and positive affirmation
• May react very emotionally to stressful situations
• Have difficulty leaving a bad relationship
• Have difficulty scolding or punishing others
• Tend to be reserved about expressing their feelings
• Perfectionistic tendencies may cause them to not give themselves enough credit
• Tendency to blame themselves for problems, and hold everything on their own shoulders

INFPs feels tremendous loyalty and commitment to their relationships. With the Feeling preference dominating their personality, harmony and warm feelings are central to the INFP's being. They feel a need to be in a committed, loving relationship. If they are not involved in such a relationship, the INFP will be either actively searching for one, or creating one in their own minds.

INFPs tendency to be idealistic and romantically-minded may cause them to fantasize frequently about a "more perfect" relationship or situation. They may also romanticize their mates into having qualities which they do not actually possess. Most INFPs have a problem with reconciling their highly idealistic and romantic views of life with the reality of their own lives, and so they are constantly somewhat unsettled with themselves and with their close personal relationships. However, the INFP's deeply-felt, sincere love for their mates and their intense dislike of conflict keeps the INFP loyal to their relationships, in spite of their troubles achieving peace of mind.

Unlike other types who tend to hold their mates up on a pedestal, the INFP's tendency to do so does not really turn into a negative thing in the relationship. INFPs hold tightly to their ideals, and work hard at constantly seeing their mates up on that pedestal. The frequent INFP result is a strongly affirming, proud and affectionate attitude towards their mates which stands the test of time.

INFPs are not naturally interested in administrative matters such as bill-paying and house-cleaning, but they can be very good at performing these tasks when they must. They can be really good money managers when they apply themselves.

Sexually, the INFP is likely to be initially slow to open up to their mates. Once their trust has been earned, the INFP will view sexual intimacy as an opportunity for expressing their deep-seated love and affection. More than the actual sexual act, they will value giving and receiving love and sweet words. With their tendency to enjoy serving others, they may value their mates satisfaction above their own.

One real problem area for the INFP is their intensive dislike of conflict and criticism. The INFP is quick to find a personal angle in any critical comment, whether or not anything personal was intended. They will tend to take any sort of criticism as a personal attack on their character, and will usually become irrational and emotional in such situations. This can be a real problem for INFPs who are involved with persons who have Thinking and Judging preferences. "TJ"s relate to others with a objective, decisive attitude that frequently shows an opinion on the topic of conversation. If the opinion is negative, the TJ's attitude may be threatening to the INFP, who will tend to respond emotionally to the negativity and be vaguely but emphatically convinced that the negativity is somehow the INFP's fault.

For INFPs with extremely dominant Feeling preferences who have not developed their Intuitive sides sufficiently to gather good data for their decision making processes, their dislike of conflict and criticism can foretell doom and gloom for intimate relationships. These INFPs will react with extreme emotional distress to conflict situations, and will not know what to do about it. Since they will have no basis for determining what action to take, they will do whatever they can to get rid of the conflict - which frequently means lashing out irrationally at others, or using guilt manipulation to get their mates to give them the positive support that they crave. This kind of behavior does not bode well for healthy, long-term relationships. Individuals who recognize this tendency in themselves should work on their ability to take criticism objectively rather than personally. They should also try to remember that conflict situations are not always their fault, and they're definitely not the end of the world. Conflict is a fact of life, and facing it and addressing it immediately avoids having to deal with it in the future, after it has become a much larger problem.

INFPs are very aware of their own space, and the space of others. They value their personal space, and the freedom to do their own thing. They will cherish the mate who sees the INFP for who they are, and respects their unique style and perspectives. The INFP is not likely to be overly jealous or possessive, and is likely to respect their mate's privacy and independence. In fact, the INFP is likely to not only respect their mate's perspectives and goals, but to support them with loyal firmness.

In general, INFPs are warmly affirming and loving partners who make the health of their relationships central in their lives. Although cautious in the beginning, they become firmly loyal to their committed relationships, which are likely to last a lifetime. They take their relationships very seriously, and will put forth a great deal of effort into making them work.

Although two well-developed individuals of any type can enjoy a healthy relationship, INFP's natural partner is the ENFJ, or the ESFJ. INFP's dominant function of Introverted Feeling is best matched with a partner whose dominant function is Extraverted Feeling. The INFP/ENFJ combination is ideal, because it shares the Sensing way of perceiving, but the INFP/ESFJ combination is also a good match.

INFPs are "natural" parents. They accept and enjoy the parental role, seeing it as the natural extension of their value systems. They make use of the parental role for developing and defining their values further, and consider it their task to pass their values on to their children. They take their role quite seriously. Warm, affirming, and flexible, the INFP generally makes a gentle and easy-going parent in many respects.

INFPs do not like conflict situations, and will keep themselves flexible and diverse to promote a positive, conflict-free environment in their home. The INFP is not naturally prone to dole out punishment or discipline, and so is likely to adapt to their mate's disciplinary policy, or to rely on their mates to administer discipline with the children. In the absence of a mating parent, the INFP will need to make a conscious effort of creating a structure for their children to live within.

Although the INFP dislikes punishing others, they hold strong values and will not tolerate the violation of a strongly-held belief. If they feel that their child has truly committed a wrong, the INFP parent will not have a problem administering discipline. They will directly confront the child, stubbornly digging in their heels and demanding recourse.

The INFP parent is likely to value their children as individuals, and to give them room for growth. They will let the children have their own voice and place in the family.

Extremely loving and devoted parents, INFPs will fiercely protect and support their children. If there is an issue involving "taking sides", you can bet the INFP will always be loyal to their children.

INFPs are usually remembered by their children as loving, patient, devoted, and flexible parents.

INFPs are warm and caring individuals who highly value authenticity and depth in their personal relationships. They are usually quite perceptive about other people's feelings and motives, and are consequently able to get along with all sorts of different people. However, the INFP will keep their true selves reserved from others except for a select few, with whom they will form close and lasting friendships. With their high ideals, they are likely to be drawn to other iNtuitive Feelers for their closer friendships.

With their strong need for harmony and dislike of conflict, INFPs may feel threatened by people with strong Judging and Thinking preferences. Although they're likely to be able to work well professionally with such individuals, they may have difficulty accepting or appreciating them on a personal level. They generally feel a kinship and affinity with other Feeling types.

INFPs will be valued by their confidantes as genuine, altruistic, deep, caring, original individuals.